"The Slasher" Fake Horror Franchise
In the previous post, I mentioned writing a story involving toys based on a slasher movie franchise. I adapted an idea from some writing I did as a teenager and created a fake movie franchise for a character known as The Slasher. The following is an imagined series of thirteen movies and a TV series. In case, as is likely, you don’t know a lot about such franchises, I promise you that years of close research involving the entire Friday the 13th, Halloween, A Nightmare On Elm Street, Scream and Child’s Play series, among many more, contributed directly to this parody.
A Dog and His Boy (1978)
In this seventies-era exploitation cult classic, 1950s teenage Iowa farm boy, Simon Lasher, is struck by lightning. His dog, Barney, begins talking to him, telling him to kill people. So he puts a paper-bag on his head and does what the dog says. Barney shows him the way to all his victims, from his own family to the teenagers camping out at the lake. Simon kills most of them and is captured by the police. As he is led away, he hears Barney taunting him and laughing at him.
Slasher: A Dog and His Boy, Part II (1980)
Barney is put up for adoption and taken home by a nice family from the next town over. Meanwhile, during a prison riot, Simon Lasher escapes from prison. He attempts to track down his dog, followed by his prison psychologist and the final girl from the first movie, leaving a trail of death behind him. Barney, though, wants nothing to do with Simon and defends his new family from him. Then Simon kills Barney, and the shrink and the dog's new boy (Dave) kill off Simon.
Slasher 3D (1982)
After nearly dying, a deranged Simon Lasher slips out of the county morgue and begins killing people at a carnival. He catches a lift with a carny to a party out at the lake, where he kills some more. The shrink and Dave, the kid whose dog Simon killed in the last movie, chase him down again; the shrink is killed and Dave, who begins to hear a different dog talking to him, goes insane and has to be locked up. Simon, meanwhile escapes into the night.
Slasher IV: Final Slice (1984)
During a lightning storm, Dave (now a teen), is hearing voices and escapes from his mental institution. A new group of teens and a troubled family, with a teen daughter with ESP, are staying at the lake resort. Someone starts killing people. It's soon revealed that this is Dave, experiencing a new dimension in madness as he believes many of the animals are speaking to him all the time. Dave is clumsy and somewhat inept, but also manages to kill, so he's dangerous; but the other teens manage to fight him off. Then the real Slasher shows up—the paper-bag wearing killer, presumably Simon Lasher returning—and kills Dave and most of the others. The girl with ESP and her younger sister manage to kill Simon and survive.
Slasher V: Kill Night (1985)
Simon takes revenge on ESP girl at her college sorority house. He fails, but kills a lot of people.
Slasher VI: Electronica (1988)
Scientists discover a living electrical current keeping Simon Lasher alive no matter how often he's killed. They attempt to harness it for use in super soldier technology, but end up releasing an amped-up super-powered version of The Slasher, which is how people refer to him. He kills, he shoots electric bolts from his body and can rudimentarily control people with electricity. In one scene—he's back at the college—he electrifies a bunch of students using EDM-like sounds and controls their dancing and can use them in a swarm-like way. The military comes in to kill Simon, but he escapes onto the nascent Internet.
The Slasher Returns (1992)
After the debacle that was S6, the franchise took a few years off and returned with a back-to-basics sequel—not a reboot or remake, but a retcon, in which episodes 4-6 never happened. Dave was released from the institution, successfully cured and now is a young family man. He stays at a lakehouse with his pregnant wife and some friends, while The Slasher has returned to the nearby summer camp. Dave can't remember most of his past trauma but it comes roaring back when he and his wife are attacked.
S. Lasher (1994)
A series reboot, throwing it all out and doing an origin story. In recounting the story of "Simon Lasher," the story is also told of an ancestor of his who was also struck by lightning and went on a rampage in the 1950s (a nod to the original film), also named Simon. The device of a dog that speaks to Simon is removed in favor of a stripped-down, more elemental horror tone.
The Slasher (1996)
A direct sequel to S. Lasher, we follow him as he makes a name for himself as a brutal serial killer. Even artsier and more elemental than the previous movie. "If Bresson made Friday the 13th," as one critic put it.
Slasher X (1998)
For the tenth outing of the series, the filmmakers increased the budget and brought back a number of actors from earlier movies. Most play new roles, in a somewhat tongue-in-cheek slasher movie set during Fourth of July celebrations in a lakeside town in Iowa.
A Dog and His Boy (2002)
A remake of the original film, and an attempt at a serious exploration of insanity; the talking dog is back. The dog was killed in an accident when Simon Lasher was a boy. He had to finish off the dog himself. Ever since, he's had visions of the dog instructing him to commit terrible deeds as a kind of penance. Simon blacks out and can't remember what he does. What he does is, he puts a bag over his head and kills people. He otherwise tries to live a normal life as a small town farmworker. A psychologist helps the police stop his rampage and institutionalizes him out of state.
Simon Lasher (2004)
A continuation of the remake series, as Lasher escapes institutionalization, blacks out, tries to start a new life down the road, then starts having visions of his dog again. He kills his way back to his hometown and a confrontation with his psychologist, in which he kills the psychologist and escapes into the woods. At the very end, a certain lumberjack shows up in town, to the audience's delight.
Slasher vs. Chopper (2010)
A cross-over with the Chopper franchise, which is about a lumberjack possessed by a folk demon. When Chopper comes to Iowa, he kills a hapless camper on Slasher's territory. Slasher no like. Chopper kills Slasher once and for all, then gets burned to death.
Slasher: The Series (1990-1992)
There's also a two season 90s TV series that was spun out of the wreckage of Slasher 6. With Simon Lasher now an "online computer demon," he's moved away from pure evil and murder to helping plucky sorority pledge, Tiff Newsom, solve mysteries on campus. Fans of the movies generally pretend this doesn't exist.
In addition to the movies and the TV show, there are numerous comic books, novelizations and various lines of toys and action figures; and several video games across three generations of consoles. The N64 first-person hack and slash is generally considered the best one.